Saturday, October 18, 2014

Honesty is the Best Policy

I know that I am making a bold move by posting this. I know that I will meet people with both positive and negative remarks. So be it. I felt that it was important to share this because I know that most of the people reading this blog will be understanding, supportive, and helpful.

I need to stat with a little bit of a background.

When I was 17, at the end of my junior year, I was diagnosed with Adult ADHD. It's considered "adult" if you're diagnosed after 12 years of age. My doctor told me that it's something I had probably had my entire life, but it had just gone unnoticed. Anyway, I was diagnosed at a moderate-severe level and my mother decided that I should go on medication. Like any medication, side effects can occur with the positive fixes. The medication made me hyper-focused, to the point that I could not multi-task anymore. Plus, it made me almost constantly hungry, which is more of just a nuisance. Anyway, when I turned 18, I decided to put my adult foot down and stop taking my medication. Since then, I have been able to more or less maintain the symptoms. Though, I truly know this just maintaining/surviving has had it's downsides, as well.

Anyway, back to the present, my ADHD symptoms have come back with a vengeance. Recent financial, workplace, and family stresses have, more or less, caused me to spiral out of control. I find myself not able to concentrate at work, losing interest in other things, unable to get anything done, and really struggling to sleep at night. Actually, it's been taking me about 1-2 hours each night to fall asleep and then waking up several times in the night, in a panic about something or other. As you can imagine, a lack of sleep only makes ADHD worse.

I don't want to make it sound like I am whining or making things up. I know that maybe people don't think ADHD is a real thing, but from what I live, it is very real. With that being said, I have decided that it is time to start seeing a doctor again to discuss these symptoms and most likely, go back on medication. Sadly, because I work as a nanny, I have private insurance, which does not cover things in the "mental health" department. I will be paying for appointments and medicine out of my own pocket. I have put this off because I simply do not have the money.

Looking over my budget, the only place I have not scrimped on over this last year is my sponsorships. I have avoided having to take this step, but avoiding it is no longer an option. I have to cut back my sponsorships. I need to basically cut them in half. I need to go from 10 sponsorships to 5. Amazingly, one of my boys has already found a new sponsor, so I will not list him. These are the other four boys that I would love to find a new sponsor for. I don't want to outright just cancel these sponsorships and I'm hoping to be able to find them all new sponsors within the next month.

I have extra pictures of all of these boys that I will share with you if you decide to sponsor

Enoc is 4 years old and live in Honduras. He lives with his parents and has one brother. His father works as a sawyer and his mother is a tutor at the Compassion project. Enoc is ALL boy and enjoys rolling around in the dirt and getting absolutely filthy.  

Manuel is my newest sponsorship and I am sad that I will be giving him up so soon, but he's at a new project and I think he will adapt fine with a new sponsor. He is 9 years old and lives in Ecuador. He isn't listed as special needs, but he does have dwarfism, which will cause him to be of short-stature his whole life. He lives with both of his parents. His father is a laborer. Manuel has above average performance in school and is a really smart boy!

Sandesh will be turning 11 in November. He is a very sweet boy and seems to have a calm demeanor. Everyone in his family is Christian and love the Lord with all their hearts. He lives with both of his parents who work as laborers. Sandesh has an older brother and a younger sister. Sandesh enjoys playing group games like soccer and cricket. He is in 5th grade and is doing well in school. 

Lastly, is my sweet Domenik. Domenik is sponsored through World Vision. If you currently sponsor with WV or have been thinking of sponsoring with WV, this sweet boy would be a great addition to your family. Domenik is from Albania. As you probably know from my blog, communication from Albania is amazing. Domenik is 7 years old. He lives with his parents and his little sister. His family owns their own small store, which is father runs. His mother stays home with his sister, as she is too young for school. Domenik is in 1st grade and is doing very well. He most enjoys playing soccer. 

Like I said, I have extra pictures of all of these boys, so if you decide to sponsor one of them, I will share all of those pictures with you. I will also share any information with you that I know and answer any questions you may have. 

For those of you who may be thinking it, I know that these are real children and that they aren't here for me to cancel sponsorships on a whim. As you've (hopefully) taken from this post, this is not a whim I am feeling. It is time for me to make my health and wellness and priority before things get even worse. 

If you are interested in sponsoring one of these boys, please email me at We can discuss about how to transfer them onto your account. 


  1. You've gotta do what you've gotta do. I really hope people will be understanding and not post hateful comments. I think it's honorable that you are attempting to find sponsorships for these boys instead of just calling up and canceling them, which is what most people (and to be honest, probably me too) would do.

    Ultimately, you have to put your health and well-being first. I suffer from anxiety and some very OCD-like symptoms so I TOTALLY understand where you are coming from here. It is a struggle sometimes.

    If I hadn't just taken on another WV girl from Bangladesh, I would take Dominik in a heartbeat. I have an Albanian girl and you're right, the communication is outstanding. But alas, I'm about to get a new car in December so I know that a seventh sponsorship is not on the cards. Good luck!!!!

    1. It means a lot that you would even consider it. Domenik would be blessed to have you as sponsor. I am hoping that they can all find loving sponsors before next month. If they don't, I will have to cancel the sponsorships.

  2. I imagine this must have been such a hard decision!!! I know how much you love your boys. I'm so sorry that you have been experiencing health difficulties... Health expenses can be so hard!! They're necessities, but not really fun and crazy expensive. I'll be praying for your boys to find sponsors quickly. They're all such precious guys.

    1. It was a very hard decision, but not something that I can put off anymore. Thank you for your prayers. I hope they all find loving sponsors before next month.